Impulsive Living or Just Living?

Bucket lists.  Why do we create “bucket lists?”  Better yet, why do we create bucket lists and then stress out whether or not we complete the “bucket list.”  Isn’t that contradicting the idea of relaxation and living a stress-free life?  Bucket lists are meant to be fun and freeing while at the same time reaching exciting goals!

I recently had surgery and was forced to stay on the couch for 6 weeks.  This is impossible for me, just so you all know.  While I was sitting on my butt I decided to create my bucket list.  It is amazing how many things you want to accomplish when you can’t.  Now that I am all recovered I found that my bucket list fell by the wayside…until one evening a bucket list opportunity was upon me. That is how you should accomplish bucket list tasks – letting them fall into your lap and not stressing out about completing them.

Needless to say, I was overcome with feelings of excitement and freedom related to “completing” the task on my bucket list.  I won’t go into detail, but it wasn’t illegal or something terrible – it was exciting, but my bucket list is personal.  The big question is how does it feel to check that accomplishment off my bucket list?  It feels AMAZING!  It was a rush of ultimate power and control – over myself!  Nobody else was telling me what to do or whether I should be doing it.  I just did it – freely.

I want to leave this life knowing that I tried everything I ever wanted to, and it didn’t matter whether or not I succeeded or failed, but that I tried.  I don’t want to miss out on anything, therefore, I live in the moment.  Some people call it impulsive, but I call it living life.  Are you living your life?

Me sitting in a chair at High Voltage Tattoo in Hollywood (love this chair – Kat Von D is sitting in one similar – or this one – on the cover of her second book)! I got a tattoo there that day. The infinity sign on my right wrist. I am enjoying life and living freely!

Dance on that Table!

Throughout our lives I worry that too many people suppress who they actually are for fear of “not fitting in.”  We are often afraid of being judged by others and because of that we miss out on many great adventures in our lives.  Those adventures may be something small or something big, but either way we are not experiencing them because of the FEAR of judgement.

So I am a table dancer.  Yep.  I am the person that jumps up on a table and dances if I love the song.  I go crazy.  I throw my hair, my arms, legs.  I take the moment in, and I am extremely carefree about it.  I will do this in a crowd full of people or by myself at home (I am also a mirror dancer – I totally rock at dancing and must witness it from time to time)!  Of course I hear the whispers in the crowd talking about my mad table dancing skills.  You know they are saying things like “she is so immature” or “she is just trying to get attention.”  So I pose the question:  am I attention seeker or the life of the party?  I always like to think I am the life of the party, but I don’t care if people think I am seeking attention.  I am not.  I am just living in the moment.  And you know what?  I bet those those people whom are judging me are silently wishing they had the guts to dance on the table too.  But they don’t – because they fear the judgement.

So my message today is simple – dance on that table like EVERYONE is watching and be sure to give them a great show!  Feel the freedom of life – dance on that table.  Take the risk.  Feel free.  Let the judgements of others roll off your body with the beat of the music.  Live in the moment and don’t miss out on anything life has to offer.

Non-conformity and Social Norms

I often wonder how we can become a more loving, caring and accepting society.  As I move through my life I run into more and more judgemental people, and often wonder to myself “why?”  Is it ignorance?  Their belief system?  Their values?  The way they were raised?

I like to live my life not caring about what other people think of me.  I like to push the limits on social norms what is “acceptable.”  I think back to my first job.  I worked in a retail clothing store, but not one a typical 16 year-old would work in (it was no Wet Seal or Forever 21).  I worked in a store that will remain nameless but let’s just say it targeted the older, professional female population.  I had gotten this job because my parents were friends with the manager, and she was willing to work with my busy high school activity schedule.  Anyone who shopped in this store will know that it was famous for “matching everything.”  So basically anyone that shopped there not only bought the red-squared printed shirt, but the matching earrings, necklace and socks. Additionally, if you saw someone dressed in an outfit like that walking down the street, you knew what store it came from.  You get the idea.  The dress code was pretty basic for the employees – dress clothing, dress shoes and no visible piercings or tattoos.  Seems easy to follow, right?  Something you should know is that this was around the time that nail polish took a risk (about 1995-997) and started creating your “not normal” colors – blue, orange, yellow, green, etc.  I, of course, felt that this was amazing and bought every color possible.  I matched my nail polish to my outfit each day.  Then it happened…”Nikki, that nail polish is not really “professional, and we don’t want our customers to stop shopping here.”  SAY WHAT?  I was young and my parents were still technically the boss of me, and they agreed with my manager.  I was just so angry.  Who decided that my nail polish wasn’t “professional?” It wasn’t in the dress code that I couldn’t wear funky colored nail polish.  So I pushed the envelope – yep – still wore it, and challenged the dress code.  I was probably pretty close to losing my job due to my “non-conformity.”  Then one day I was unpacking the boxes of stock items when guess what I found?  You got it – “unprofessional” colored nail polish.  Needless to say the disagreements about my nail polish stopped and I now got a DISCOUNT on fun nail polish.

Through my story today I want you to take two things away.  First, stop and think about how you are judging people on a daily basis.  Who are we to say what is right or wrong?  What people can wear or who people can love.  Secondly, feel the freedom of being non-judgemental.  Feel the freedom of life.  Take risks – whether they are small or big.  Go ahead – wear that funky nail polish and don’t worry or care about what others think!